Monday, December 09, 2013

12 Days of Mordor: A Rendition

by KARL STEEL

(first, perhaps you are looking to buy books this holiday season. How about this one?)

A couple days ago, Geoffrey Chaucer suggested we spice up song titles with an added "Mordor." So let's blame Chaucer, as we always do, for what my wife and I concocted after Saturday's dinner, which was:

On the twelfth day of Mordor
My Precious gave to me:
Twelve balrogs burning
Eleven Uruk sieging
Ten stewards stewing
Nine Nazgûl sniffing
Eight legs of Shelob
Seven dwarves a-delving
Sméagol and Déagol
Five Istari
Four hobbit lads
Three Elf Lords
Two Palantír
and in darkness to bind them, one ring!

If you're on fb, be sure to read the comments and join in the snarking (I know, I know: Palantíri). The great Chris Clarke was predictably brilliant (see also this). Improvements are encouraged!

credit goes mostly to my wife, Alison Kinney, but I'll happily claim any errors.

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