Friday, May 04, 2007

Dear Prof. Cohen,

Do you really seat your delicate derrière on a chair made of bungee cords?

Why yes, Dear Reader. I was not lying. You can even purchase your own at CB2.

What I like best about the chair is that if you grip the arms tightly, you can bounce a good two or three feet skyward and land without significant injury. When I assembled the chaise, the Office Manager wheeled me around the department corridor for a Grand Procession. We are thinking of renting out the chair (and its attendant Office Manager) as a university vehicle for use on special occasions. The fees collected will of course replenish our faculty sherry fund.

Dignity? Gravitas? Not in my office, thank you.


Anonymous said...


Does it truly support ALL of you?

Jeffrey Cohen said...

Thank you for your concern, Anonymous reader. According to my bathroom scale I weigh 159.5 pounds. So far the chair has had no trouble with my bulk. I am not yet ready to recommend the furniture, however, to any of ITM's more portly readers. Tests will be conducted; stay tuned.

Karl Steel said...

Wait: is this an improvement over the one I sat in?

You didn't burn the old one because of my, er, sit stench. Did you?

Jeffrey Cohen said...

You don't want me to answer that query, Karl.

Ancrene Wiseass said...

Gravitas and dignity are vastly overrated. Roving bungee chairs, on the other hand, can never get enough hype.