1. Figure: The view from my office. Follow I Street past the park and you can spot Pennsylvania Ave.
On Wednesday the Pope Mobile went screaming down Pennsylvania Avenue, bearing its sacred cargo towards a White House rendezvous. Inside the bullet-proof cube that forms the back of the Vatican SUV sat His Holiness himself, beaming benedictions to the crowds along the street's edge.
I was not on campus that day, but a small throng gathered in my office to witness the pontifical procession pass. I am told that it was splendid ... and that as the Bishop of Rome passed along the stretch of Pennsylvania Avenue that can be glimpsed from Rome Hall 760A, he gazed up at the window, saw the Tiny Shriner peering out, and waved a hasty blessing.
Oh, and I saw him in person today as he returned from the mega Mass at Nationals Stadium. He'd traded the Pope Mobile for an ordinary Mercedes.
And isn't the rumour true that your tiny Shriver is carved from an authenticated finger-bone of Christ himself? You are the holiest man I know.
I think you need to get out more, Adam.
And as to the finger-bone carved origin of the Tiny Shriner: blasphemy! The Tiny Shriner predates Christ by at least seven thousand years, at least according to the documentation I've collected.
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